I was a brand new momma, our baby was only a week old and we had just arrived in California the night before to settle into our new home.

A first time mom knows, the exhaustion is real.

Every moment of those first nights are checking to make sure the baby is still breathing, alive and safe.

Maybe it was the hormones, maybe it was a combination of things but I found myself in tears wondering how a little one could have been entrusted to me.

How could I ever protect this baby enough?

A photo of a newborn baby wrapped in a blanket in his mother's arms.

How Had We Not Heard Anything?

That first night, a new home, a new state, a new baby, and without us even knowing it, a triple homicide was happening right next door.

How had we heard nothing?! We were up all night with a new baby and it was an apartment complex!

Had there been signs we had overlooked?

It was terrifying to wake up to all the police and tape.

I wanted out of there immediately. There was no way I could have this darling, perfect baby even be around such evil.


Months later I was sitting in a chair, rocking our baby to sleep with a book in my hands.

Everyone had said it was a MUST read.

A little girl, a dark hole, a disgusting man and her mom could be heard calling her name but no one knew where she was to save her.

I slammed the book shut.

I could not sleep for weeks.

My heart knew these stories were real. It was the same reason I’d stopped watching a popular show, the content haunted me.

The Beginning of a Life-Changing Journey

As the years went on little moments would pull at my heart but I had no idea it was because I would put the tiniest toe into the world one day. My own journey would include the most disgusting, evil men and women on earth.

To be continued…Part 2